I feel like a person living on the brink of a volcano crater.
Like all my family and class, I considered it a sign of weakness to show affection; to have been caught kissing my mother would have been a disgrace, and to have shown affection for my father would have been a disaster.
Everybody calls everybody a spy, secretly, in Russia, and everybody is under surveillance. You never feel safe.
Now, being a girl, I was ashamed of my body and my lack of strength. So I tried to be a man. I shot, rode, jumped, and took part in all the fights of the boys.
I have no objection to a man being a man, however masculine that may be.